International Dating : Common Relationship Challenges of Dating Overseas
International Dating has been around for a very long time. It used to be a tedious process, and finding the perfect mate was rare without having to visit a foreign country.
Today online dating and international matchmaking services are continually rising in popularity. This has added a new dynamic to dating as it has widened the horizons of prospective singles. In fact, studies have shown that the majority of international marriages have proved to be more stable compared to intra-cultural marriages.
The singles that go through the trouble of finding a mate from other countries tend to lean on to find love and long term relationships and are therefore looking to find other singles that are looking for the same thing they are.
International marriages come with their own unique set of challenges, especially when dating someone overseas. After all, coming from different countries, you can be sure that there will be things that you will not necessarily agree upon on the get go.
The numbers fully show that dating overseas is a good option to consider. However, sociologists also note that such a step will require your full understanding that with the added factors of distance and differences in culture, you have to expect that an adjustment on both you and your spouse’s side will have to be made in order to accommodate and cohabitate with each other.
There will be bumps in the road, but that shouldn’t stop you from having a lasting relationship.
International Dating and Communications
In every relationship, communication remains one of the most important dynamics. If communication fails, chances are the relationship will too. Essentially, communication is your bridge to each other not just to talk but to know more about each other as well, especially in international dating.
When you’re within reach of your partner, communication isn’t always about talking. Non-verbal communication also happens. There’s the body language, facial expressions, and other forms of non-verbal cues that you can utilize to improve your communication skills. Sometimes it’s not all about talking but about telling someone something even without saying a word.
However, in international dating, these non-verbal communication gestures aren’t applicable. This is when it gets harder as you will have to fill in the gaps via voice calls or emails. The dynamics of communicating long distance becomes more challenging as your significant other may be thousands of miles away. Your main medium of communication will be an added variable to the challenge.
An added factor when it comes to communication is the time difference, especially when you and your partner aren’t with each other at the moment. We can't deny that it’s always better to have a live conversation with your significant other. Differences in time zones make this challenging as your free time might not align with each other.
Intercultural Differences
Perhaps the most difficult challenge, one that will usually have a lasting impact throughout the marriage, is cultural differences. Cultures vary greatly across nations, and it is very evident around the Eastern and Western corners of the globe. Cultural adaptation is a constant challenge, even years into a successful international relationship.
Differences in culture will also mean differences in interests. Now this will vary even amongst intra-cultural marriages, however, this issue is more likely in intercultural marriages. Finding similar interests might not seem like a necessary aspect when it comes to marriages, but it will help you spend more time with each other when you’re doing something you both enjoy .
Intimacy
The word intimacy, especially on the subject of relationships, is often associated with sexual relations. But intimacy goes beyond sex. Intimacy is the emotional, mental, social, physical, as well as the sexual components in a romantic relationship.
Intimacy has also been conceptualized as a sense of self disclosure, sharing of one’s self and feeling closer to one’s partner. Intimacy is maintained by engagement in intimate conversation and is considered a major part of romantic relationships. It is also an important factor for psychological wellbeing and is linked to positive and satisfying relationships.
It is difficult to have a sense of intimacy in an international relationship when you’re thousands of miles away. Cultural differences will also affect the expectations one may have when it comes to intimacy. Different cultures are more conservative in terms of expressing their intimate thoughts while other cultures are more open to expressing their emotions to their partner.
It is fair to assume that the quality of the romantic relationship will often be judged by the frequency of intimate interactions as perceived by each individual. It is these unmet expectations of intimacy that can often negatively affect a relationship and pose challenges for the couple.
Matchmaking experts dealing with loss of intimacy in romantic relationships should help clients develop trust and communication skills that can help to overcome barriers to intimacy.
Conflict
Conflict is part of any interpersonal relationship and occurs as a result of differences in opinions. People differ in values, dreams, desires and perceptions. Therefore, we are all bound to encounter conflict at some point in our lives. Conflict can range from less serious mild disagreements to more intensely heated arguments. Previous research has found that marital conflict often stems from unmet needs, wants, and desires. From this perspective, marital conflict is defined as a process of interaction in which one or both partners feel discomfort about some aspect of their relationship and try to resolve it in some manner.
Seeking Advice for International Couples
It is never wrong to seek advice or professional help when it comes to making a relationship work. Relationship problems are to be expected in any partnership. It is important for both of you to acknowledge that there is an issue and to submit to seeking professional help. Don’t wait for the pressing issue to evolve into bigger issues. It is best to tackle these challenges while they’re still fresh.
Taking the step of seeking proper relationship advice also means finding the right counselor. Finding the right mediator to listen to and give dating advice will allow you to not only work on your problems but to essentially grow as a couple.
Most often, international dating apps don’t offer these services so it would be difficult and quite expensive to seek the help of a professional counselor. International dating service matchmakers are the best way for you to meet your foreign partner, but also seek support from professional matchmakers when it comes to building a lasting relationship and to find love in international dating.